Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Michigan Man Protests Losing His Son After Mistakenly Giving Him Alcoholic Lemonade

Michigan Man Protests Losing His Son After Mistakenly Giving Him Alcoholic Lemonade

This is crazy. First, the headline made me think his son had died. Then as I read further, I saw that this man was not necessarily a bad father, maybe just an idiot. A $7 lemonade at a major league game might have seemed steep, but not altogether unheard of. He's an idiot, but not necessarily deserving to lose his son.

Thursday, April 10, 2008

American Idol: Shout To The Lord

So last night, on the "American Idol: Idol Gives Back" show, the grand finale was "Shout To The Lord". Did anyone else notice they changed the words. They sang "My shepherd, my savior" Rather than singing the name of Jesus. I’m not sure how I feel about that.
I mean, the song goes on to say how "mountains will bow and the seas will roar at the sound of Your name". Who’s name? You weren’t even bold enough to sing it.
I understand why they did that. You don’t want to focus on only one religion on a national show like that. And I’m sure they had to get Derlene ZCHECHCHech’s (I think thats how you really spell it.) permission to do the song. I guess if I were in her place I’m much rather have them change one word and do the song, then not do it at all.
Clearly the producers on AI know a good song when they hear one and they wanted a big ending that would draw some emotion and sound good backed by a gospel choir. I think they choise wisely. But I think were I one of the Idols. (stop laughing) I would have sung "Jesus" anyway.
Having said that it was a great performance of the song.
"Forever I’ll love you, Forever I’ll stand. Nothing compares to the promise I have in You." not even being on American Idol.Oh yeah, one more thing: Heart and Fergie doing "Barracuda" was awesome. Who knew Fergie could sing? I gues those years on Kids Incorporated really paid off.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Ready! Aim! Fire!

At work today we got to talking about stupid things we did as kids. I shared this story. People were surprised I survived my childhood. Enjoy!

When I was 9 I found a shotgun shell in my parents bedroom. I had seen them before because my dad would take me hunting every once in a while (he was more of a fisherman than a hunter). As I looked at this shell I was amazed how such a little thing could inflict so much damage. So I, being the inquisitive child that I was (I was the kind of kid that took stuff apart to see how it worked) decided to figure out how a shotgun shell worked.

As my examination began I realized that the metal end had a little divot in the middle and that some sort of part in the gun must hit that spot and make the bullet come out the other side. I was too young and stupid to realize it was gunshot and gunpowder inside. I began to wonder how hard I would have to hit that spot to make it shoot. I knew I didn't want to shoot my foot off or shoot anything in the house, so I took my experiment outside. Also realizing that it might do damage to my hand if I hit it while holding it I tried to figure out a way to strike the metal divot without actually touching it.. Then I had a eureka moment. I could shoot it with my BB gun.

All I needed to do was lay the shell on a tree stump, lay down close to the stump and aim at the metal part of the shell. If I was a good enough shot, I would hit the small divot and make the bullet some out the other side... So it began. I did just that and was lining up my shot when all of a sudden, by 4 yr old sister, Leslie, walked out of the house behind me. Again, another eureka moment. How was I going to know where the bullet went if I wasn't watching it. (I was staring intently at my target.) I needed someone to be beside the shell on the stump to watch it shoot out. "Hey Leslie, come here I've got a good idea" ...

And so began my explanation of what I was up to. Without hesitation and trusting her big brother she got on the ground approximately 3 feet to the side of the shell. There I am laying behind it like a sniper ready to hit the metal end with a BB..." are you ready? One, two, three...."


The shell absolutely exploded. I had done it, I had hit the metal part. Leslie looked at me confused.. "where did the bullet part go?" Neither of us had any idea (again we didn't know it was full of gunshot. not a solid bullet). I was so amazed and excited that I had hit it I immediately ran inside and did, what I later realized, the dumbest thing in this whole story. I told my Mom. "Hey Mom guess what I just did?"

She looked at me in shock, not saying a word. After a minute she very calmly said "I heard something and thought you had wrecked your bike into the side of the van." Then she began to get angry and said "You could have killed your sister" then she started to cry. The end of that conversation was my least favorite phrase I ever heard as a kid "we'll have a talk with your dad when he gets home."

There's more to this story, but it involves a belt, a lot of crying and screaming, and one kid who learned a lesson. That lesson… If you're going to do something cool, don't invite your little sister.

THE END…totally true story